When Life Is Full of What You Wanted

Life can be so full of what we wanted that it can feel overwhelming. Stifling, even.

Sometimes it feels like waves crashing against the coast. I picture myself underwater, waiting for the wave to recede so I can catch my breath. And then the next one comes.

That has been this month. No, this year. Well, actually… longer.

So much of what fills my plate is there because I chose it. Work I love. People I care about. Causes that matter deeply to me. Yet the plate can become so full that things tumble off. Decisions happen on the fly. My nervous system, at times, feels shot.

I can be grateful for this life and still need some breathing room.

How are you doing with “all that is”?

Astrologically, we’re in a season associated with reflection and reevaluation, with several planets in retrograde. The invitation is to turn inward, reconsider what we value, and notice where our lives may be asking for change. Whether or not you follow astrology, you may recognize the feeling: something needs to shift.

I suspect I’m not the only one feeling it.

When overwhelm starts to overtake me, I draw on coping skills that help me respond to what I need in the moment. Three approaches are especially helpful.

Address what is causing the stress.

Problem-focused coping invites me to look at what I can actually change. What needs my attention today? What can wait? Where do I need help, a clearer boundary, or a more realistic expectation?

Help my body settle.

I spend much of my workday on Zoom, teaching or coaching. I can get so absorbed in the work that I barely notice how long I’ve been sitting or where I’m holding tension.

Getting up, walking, or moving gently gives me a chance to notice how my body feels and respond. I’m learning to make room for that throughout the day.

Return to the present.

Mindfulness and grounding help me bring my attention back to my breath and to what is happening right now. I feel my feet on the floor. Notice my surroundings. Give myself a moment before responding.

The tasks may still be there, but I can approach the next one with a little more steadiness.

One of the benefits of living more than 60 years on this planet is having a treasure trove of experience to draw from. When I feel my energy shift, I ask myself:

“Vanessa, what do you know that can help right now?”

I get quiet, focus on my breath, and picture ease and answers flowing to and through me. Often, a next step becomes clear. 

I still love so much of what fills my life. I’m also learning to leave enough room to live it.

What do you know that could help you right now?